All-Encompassing Apple Guide for Forbes et al.

Is Apple doomed?

No.

Should Tim Cook be fired?

Nope.

Is innovation over at Apple?

Nay.

Should I believe anything Forbes/WSJ/Other Journalist-Free-Zone Publications say?

Do you believe in horoscopes?

Will Apple enter new markets soon?

Yes.

Will you feel you NEED to have their new category product?

Yup.

Will Apple stock go up?

Does a bear crap in the woods?